Confidence Motivation

Reflect to Set your Value Based Goals

Farewell 2010

As we leap in to the next decade, lets think about what we are planning on leaving behind and what we will be taking with us in 2020. It is, when we start to think about goal setting, but before we get to this; it is time for some real reflection. Maybe a perfect ME moment. Sit down with a nice cuppa by the fire on your favourite couch, and let me take you through reflection. May be you will want to write the answers down to some questions I’m going to probe you with. Ready!

# How have you spent the last decade?

# What has gone well, and what hasn’t?

# In which area of your life have you excelled?

# What do you feel you lack in?

# What are you going to change, what are you going to keep?

# Who are your true friends?

# Who inspires you?

# What are your strengths and weaknesses?

# What have you achieved?

Feel free to add more questions, keep the reflection momentum going. You will see and feel the magic of reflection happen. Reflecting is an awesome skill (which is not practiced enough as it should be) It keeps the soul aligned and focused. Keeping one in constant progression and developing mode.

Time to Change

Now that you have some answers, organise them in order of priority. Just ponder over them, allowing your feelings and emotions to run wildly. As you see you will find yourself questioning yourself about the good and bad happenings in your life, but remember the point of reflections is not to wallow in self-pity and torment yourself about what could, should you have done to do things differently. Instead, it time to say ‘well this is good about me and that isn’t, which I am going to change’, then start to make a list of all the things you want to achieve and change, doesn’t matter what comes to your mind, just write words and phrases about what you want for your life, going forward. Think about your values, what you stand for.

How do you want to change? and don’t forget the biggest question Why. Why do you want this change? Here if you can associate more reasons, then you can be assured that you will find the intrinsic motivation. As the Why propels the movement and drives us to achieve the goals we want to set.

Let me remind you, wanting change for the greater good and betterment is far more fruitful and beneficial to the soul and for the rest of humanity, than desiring change to benefit yourself. Bring all your loved ones and work aquaintances in the picture. As when you change, your change will impact them. Hence, your value based goals need to be aligned; think about who and how you change will impact. Just take a minute to visualise the new you. Who are you? what are your wearing? How do you look? What is your persona like? How are people feeling in your company? Imagine yourself as a celebrity, you’re being admired and loved. How does it feel to be living those value based goals?

One thing to remember here is that even if you feel it was not you that have lagged your shortcomings, but the consequences of others, but how you dealt and handled the situation was down to you. Hence, we cannot change the world, but we can make changes on yourself and have control over our thoughts, intentions and actions. What are your Values?

Intentions set Actions! Have good intentions and you will succeed.

Set New Goals

Now its time to put pen to paper. The power of setting goals is immense. As said beautifully:

The great and glorious masterpiece of man is to know how to live to purpose.

Michel De Montaigne

Hence, recording your purpose, solidifies and confirms your intentions.

But don’t just set any kind of goals set goals that are aligned with your values as these goals are the ones that are going to give you more of a satisfaction at a deeper level.

Equip yourself to Succeed

A recent study reported that 45 percent of Americans usually make New Year’s Resolutions, 17 percent claimed to infrequently make New Year’s Resolutions, and 38 percent admit to never making resolutions. Of those who set resolutions, the study found that 49 percent experienced infrequent success, 24 percent continually fail on all of their resolutions, and just 8 percent succeed in achieving the resolution that they set for themselves. Similar figures can correlate to people in the UK. The study also reported that after determining the New Year’s Resolution that they’d like to set and commit themselves to, a full 25 percent of resolution-setters have failed to keep their commitment for even one full week. About 29 percent are quitting before two weeks has passed. They found that 36 percent dropped off before the first month had ended, and just 54 percent made it six full months in pursuit for their resolution. The study also reported that 39 percent of people in their 20s achieve their resolution each year, while only 14 percent of those above the age of 50 can say the same. Why do you think this is?

So why the high failure rate?

Why do so many abandon ship, get distracted, or lose confidence in their abilities? There are several major causes. The answer to the question is that the WHY is not big enough.


So, the question is how do you plan to live the next decade, what needs to change, why does it need to change and how will you change it. Cliche it may sound; No pain no gain! No change, stay the same!

Set Intention and follow it by action, and leave it to the higher force to assist you to reach your higher- value- based, aligned goals.

I wish you all beautiful people love and prosperity. Life is beautiful and a precious gift. We should aim to live it to our full potential.

Make yours count.

By Salma

Life Skills Educator/Coach

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